Getting engaged is one of the sweetest seasons of your life, but it can also come with the question that every couple eventually asks… what do we do after getting engaged? Before you begin booking venues or reaching out to vendors, there are a few foundational steps that will set the tone for a smooth, joyful planning experience. At Lila Lane Events, we believe your engagement should be filled with clarity, connection, and confidence, not confusion or overwhelm.

Below is what you’ll find in this guide:
• The first conversations every newly engaged couple should have
• Mistakes to avoid in the earliest stages of planning
• The logistical steps that create a strong foundation
• How hiring a planner early simplifies everything
• Questions to ask before touring venues
• When you’re truly ready to start booking vendors
• How to balance design priorities with your budget
• Ways to keep your engagement season stress-free

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1. Start With a Conversation as a Couple

Before any planning begins, take time to talk through what matters most to both of you. These early questions will guide every decision that follows.

Ask yourselves:
• How do you want your wedding day to feel?
• Will this be a large celebration or an intimate gathering?
• Will everything take place in one location or two?
• What are the top three priorities you share as a couple?

These answers become the blueprint for your budget, your venue, your timeline, and your vendor team.

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2. Avoid This Common Early Mistake

One of the biggest missteps newly engaged couples make is booking a venue that takes up most of their budget. It may be a beautiful space, but if it limits your ability to design the wedding you envisioned or hire the vendors you love, it often leads to stress later.

Your venue should support your overall vision, not restrict it.

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3. Set the Logistical Foundation

Before you can make confident decisions, you need clarity in four areas:

• Guest count – It impacts everything from venue size to catering to rentals.
• Budget – Be realistic about what you’re comfortable spending.
• Location – Decide where your celebration will take place, especially if travel is involved.
• Planner – Determine whether you want full-service support or partial planning.

These are the building blocks that make the entire planning process smoother.

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4. Why Hiring a Planner Early Matters

Hiring a planner early ensures you begin in the right place, with the right information, at the right time. Think about it like this: hiring a planner ensures that the foundation of your event is built on rock and not sand. When your foundation is strong, you avoid missteps that cost time and money down the line, and you’ll understand everything as decisions are made.

Your planner helps:

• Guide you through the process and make sure you are starting in the right place to keep everything smooth
• Walk you through the “why” behind recommendations so you feel confident and informed
• Ensure you understand venue requirements such as catering or bar policies, rental needs, transportation considerations, ceremony timing, and more
• Prevent decisions that are wasteful or could cause you to backtrack later

A planner should never lead you astray or make the process confusing. Planning should feel supported, clear, and grounded from the very beginning!

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5. Questions to Ask Before Touring Any Venue

Touring venues is exciting, but it’s so important to arrive prepared. Before you schedule or go on any venue tours, ask yourselves:
• Does this venue support our must-haves and overall vision?
• Will transportation be needed for guests?
• If using two locations, what is the distance and travel time between them?
• Are there time restrictions we need to work within? Are we okay with those restrictions?
• What do catering, bar, rental, and other venue requirements look like?

These questions help you determine whether a venue truly fits your needs before you fall in love with it.

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6. What Impacts the Feel and Flow of the Day

Early decisions directly shape how your wedding feels for you and your guests. The flow from ceremony to cocktail hour to dinner (and everything in between) must be seamless.

I always encourage my couples to imagine themselves as guests:
• Is it easy to get to restrooms before the ceremony without seeing the reception?
• What will it be like to go from the ceremony, to cocktail hour, and then to dinner?
• Will guests see the reception space early, or is a room flip required?
• Does the venue have enough space for transitions?
• Does the rental fee align with your budget? (A $12k venue often means a final spend of $50k or more.)

Flow and functionality matter just as much as aesthetics.

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7. When You’re Ready to Start Booking Vendors

You’re ready when three things are set:
• Guest count
• Budget
• Venue

You can begin booking your core vendors once you have those three things confirmed. Most couples start with:

1. Photography
2. Catering
3. Entertainment
4. Florist
5. Beauty

Your order may vary slightly, but having those three foundational pieces in place ensures you book the right team with confidence.

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8. Aligning Design With Your Budget

Beautiful weddings don’t happen by accident. They’re the result of thoughtful planning and intentional budgeting.

Keep these tips in mind:
• Allocate enough funds for design early – so many couples want a specific “look”, but when it comes down to it – many may end up cutting corners because of budget
• Remember that linens, chargers, napkins, stationery, dance floors, and furniture rentals all influence the overall look and play a huge role in the design process
• Start with your florist, since so many design decisions are shaped by floral direction once you have brought them on board

When you prioritize design appropriately, your vision comes to life seamlessly.

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9. Decisions Couples Often Make Too Early

There are a few steps couples tend to jump into before they have the information they need. These early decisions seem small, but they can create confusion later in the planning process.

First: Inquiring with a florist before knowing your layout and table quantities

Your florist will need to know how many round tables versus rectangle tables you plan to use, and the design can vary significantly depending on the table shape. Before you can answer those questions, you need to know how many guests you plan to have so you can determine your table count.

Once your guest count is set, you can begin doing the math. Typically, you’ll see:
• 60-inch rounds seat about 8 guests
• 72-inch rounds seat about 10 guests
• 8-foot rectangle tables seat about 8 guests

Until those details are clear, it’s too early to inquire with a florist because they won’t be able to guide you accurately on design, quantities, or pricing. Knowing your layout ensures your floral plan aligns with your overall vision.

Second: Purchasing décor too early

It’s tempting to start collecting décor as soon as you get engaged, but buying pieces without a full design plan often leads to mismatched items that don’t work together. Instead of creating a cohesive aesthetic, these random finds can make the wedding feel disjointed or “junky.”

Hold off on purchasing décor until you have a clear direction. Once your venue, layout, floral design, and priorities are set, every piece you choose will feel intentional and connected.

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10. How to Reduce Stress and Keep Your Engagement Joyful

Two things make the biggest difference in keeping this season joyful rather than overwhelming.

Hire a planner

This may sound silly and cliché, but hiring a planner who is going to be with you throughout the planning process instantly reduces stress. This could be a full-service planner or partial support, but having someone that you are able to go to through the engagement process with is crucial. It will save you time and money in the long run and gives you a trusted professional helping you make decisions from start to finish.

Limit how many vendors you inquire with

My rule of thumb is to look at 2-4 vendors per category and then narrow it down. For instance, don’t tour 15 wedding venues. It will take the fun out of the process and make it harder to make a confident decision. Instead – narrow it down, collect the information that affects you directly, and then decide. Too many options can quickly become overwhelming.

Your engagement should be joyful, not exhausting!

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One Piece of Advice Every Newly Engaged Couple Should Hear

As much as we love a beautiful, well thought out, and design-forward wedding, it is not worth getting into financial trouble over. Please be responsible with your budget and stay in your comfort zone. Your wedding should not be about impressing others.

With your partner, choose the top three most important aspects of the day. From there, guest count plays a critical role. A large guest count instantly means a bigger price tag. If the design and rentals are really important to you but you’re working with a tighter budget, the first step may be to reduce the overall guest count. Fewer guests means fewer mouths to feed, lower drink counts, smaller table top rental counts, and fewer tables which means fewer linens, and ultimately a more intentional experience.

Your wedding is about celebrating your commitment and beginning your life together.

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Ready to Plan With Confidence?

If you’re newly engaged and want a planning experience rooted in clarity, communication, and genuine care, Lila Lane Events would be honored to walk with you through every step.

💍 Reach out here to begin your planning journey!